Dangerous Business

Well, as I have been looking around at my usual haunts, I have been seeing a few poeple doing “The Year In Review” type things, so I just got the sudden urge to do that. Like, I didn’t even know that I was going to do it until I started typing that sentince up there. Funny how things like that work out so quickly.

At the begining of the year, I lost my job at Builder’s Choice. That was quite an interesting start to the New Year, I must say. I got quite a good bonus when I left, which was about the best part of it. That was just a really weird day. I didn’t know it was coming, and after they told me, I didn’t know what to do. I stuck around and worked for a while longer, because I felt like it was the right thing to do. However, I wound up getting so sick of the place by the end of the day, that I cut out an hour or two early.

I three new amazingly awesome friends. Lauren and Rachel have been a God send to me over the past year. My friendship with Rachel has become really deep, and I consider her one of my absolute best friends now. I am still getting to know Sarah, but she’s turning out to be a God send, as well. To think, if I hadn’t gone to Atlanta with Rachel to learn how to dance. January ‘09 was my second time going, if I remember right. I think that was the time that really got me hooked in it. Thank goodness I went, is all I can say. Friendships are wonderful, esspecially during the rough times.

I got my motorcycle license in February, and then promptly took a trip ON motorcycles down to Panama City Beach Florida. Of course, if you are a regular reader of my blog, or know me, you already know the story. Which of course, that describes all of my readers, so I don’t think I have to retell the story for you. Now, if I post this somewhere else, I might need to add a few more details… or just link to the old blog post.

In March, Rachel was out of town or something, and I went down to visit with Lauren. That was my favorite day of the entire year. I don’t know what made it so special, but it definately was the best by far. I’ll remember it forever. She took me to The House of Dreams on the Berry campus. My goodness, that place is magical. I got to really get to know Lauren that day, and see just how beautiful of a young lady she is becoming. She still has a lot to learn, but she’s going to make a special woman some day.
Anyway, we went up to the House of Dreams, had pizza in the chilly windy mountain air, shooed dogs away from our lunch, and took a stroll around the garden. She then showed me her book of pictures from Costa Rica. Man, I remember it like it was yesterday. Every detail seems so vivid. After we left there, we went and watched the Godfather, so we could both be true men. haha

I wound up losing a person that was starting to become a friend, as well. Everyone did, actually. At some point, something happened with Beth, and she stopped talking to all of us. I really hated to see that happen, because she did seem like a really good kid. I know it really hurt Lauren, too. I could see it in her eyes for a long time. Unfortunately, she’s moved past being hurt, to being a little bitter. Which, I can’t say that I blame her but it is still hard to watch.

I studied for and took the ACT at the begining of the summer! I actually didn’t do nearly as badly on it as I thought I would do. Which, that actually makes it sound like I still did poorly on it, which isn’t the case. The only thing I didn’t do well on was the math, which I expected when I went into it. I can’t stand that subject.

I started applications for a couple of colleges, but I didn’t finish them, because I seriously don’t know if I want to go. I go back and forth on it all the time. It’s not only the money aspect of it, quite a bit of it is that I just don’t know if I want to. Which I find extremely frustrating, going back and forth. The indecision is absolutely killing me, but yet I continue to do it. Who knows what I will wind up doing.
I sort of feel like if I do go to college, I will wind up wasting time and not doing some really awesome things that I could have done, had I not gone. However, in the long run, I might miss out on some things that I could have done, had I gone. Either way, I’m just screwed.

Goodness, this year in terms of having crushes on people has been a little crazy. I don’t remember ever thinking that so many girls were cute, or had potential. Esspecially not when I fall on my face with them. They either aren’t interested, I never tell them I’m interested, or… well, any number of things. After all is said and done, it often makes me feel like I should just say “Good riddance” to relationships, and go about my own way.

In May, I started going to the local writer’s group. It’s been quite nice to be able to get with like minded people, and write about random stuff. I even accomplished something I never thought was possible. I wrote 50,000 words for a story in November. That was pretty amazing… Though, it did make me a bit sick of writing for a while.

The six of us (Kyle, Clint, me, Lauren, Rachel, and Sarah) went to the Renaissance Fair over the summer, before Rachel took off to go out west. Of course, the day we chose to go was an absolute downpour in the early part of the day. It was thunderstorming like crazy, with lightning strikes and stuff. After it stopped raining, it actually wasn’t too bad. There were a couple of interesting experiences there, which I think were totally worth it. I would love to go again this year, but I don’t know how it’ll all work out.

Speaking of going to fairs and stuff, the six of us also went to Dollywood several times over the course of the year. That was pretty fun every time we went. Lots of memories to hold onto forever. I hope we can have more experiences like that over the next year.

I tried out contacts… what a joke.

Lauren moved to Dalton over the summer, and Rachel moved to Wyoming. It was pretty nice having Lauren so close, but we didn’t go to see her nearly as often as I wish we could have. Not to mention she was really busy for the most of it, being the social butterfly that she is. We tried to go watch Transformers 2 with her, but that was also a joke. The theater was packed out, and we hardly saw Lauren at all. We wound up just leaving early.
We also coined the phrase “Up and Over” in Dalton, one day when we pulled into on coming traffic, and had to go over the median. That was pretty wicked.
We didn’t hear much out of Rachel for the whole summer, and we were pretty bummed out about that. Which actually wound up causing problems later on, when there were some misunderstandings, but nothing too major that we didn’t work out.

My life was tremendously slow for a couple months. I can’t really remember much of anything that I did. I was out of work, and sat at home on my computer for a good part of the time. I remember going absolutely insane from the lack of anything. That was not exactly the best time of my life. Probably some of the worst days of the year were spent in that time frame. I got into a pretty deep funk, and it took me quite a while to get out of it.

The Blizzard’s hired me in October. It was such a relief to be able to go back to work. I was hired on doing web design and building. I have now moved on to do some small work in marketing, which is pretty neat. It was definately the challenge for my brain that I needed. My brain got squishy, because I wasn’t using it enough. Yay for excersize. Of the brain. Forget that gym stuff.

Staying up super late, not wanting to go home, going to Wal*Mart and buying cream soda and Teddy Grahams. I suggest that to anyone.

I got back in contact with an ex of mine in October, as well. Seems hard to believe that I started talking to her again that long ago, looking back on it now. It seems like we just started talking a couple weeks ago. She’s gotten married in the time we’ve been back in contact. Man, talk about weird to witness. Someone I used to date, getting married to a guy with the same first name as me.
I’m glad she found the right guy though. It does make me feel old, but that’s not always a bad thing.

The last couple months of the year were just a blur. Towards the end of October, Rachel asked me to be her dance partner for the Masquerade ball. That was quite an experience as well. I will remember that one for the rest of my life too, whether I want to or not. It wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be, but it was bad enough. Looking back on it now, I am almost embarrassed that my parents and grandparents went. It seemed like such a big deal at the time, but it seems like I blew it a little bit out of proportion. Esspecially since no one else’s parents showed up. It was just all college aged kids. Oh well… I’ll always just be that weird kid who’s Rachel’s friend, at Berry.

I turned 22 years old this year. Turning a year older is starting to get to me now. I have finally hit that magical age where you start to notice you’re not a kid any more. It’s not nice. Because now the birthdays will come quicker and quicker.

Then in the past couple months, there’s been a lot of really private stuff going on, that I don’t want to put out there to the world. It’s still too fresh in my mind, and I am still mulling over it. I don’t know if it’ll ever be “old enough” to let the void/internet know about it. If you really want to know about it, you can just ask me. However, I probably won’t tell you.

What a year…

—-

Additions: More things that I have remembered after posting this a little bit ago.

I think it was back in the spring, I went down to Berry for Relay for Life, and sat up all night long with Jessica at the Swing Dance booth. It was quite funny actually, because we were the only ones at the booth for the majority of the night, and neither of us belonged to it. Jessica was more uptight about it, I didn’t care too much.
Lauren wasn’t feeling well that night, and slept for a good part of it. I took her asprin and blankets all throughout the night, and kept an eye on her. Seems like I woke her up at about 5:00am, and then we went and had breakfast at IHOP. It seems like I got an omlet, and she got pancakes with sausage, but she wasn’t hungry enough to finish them. On the way to IHOP, we stopped on the side of the highway and watched the sun rise, which was pretty amazing. After we got back, we went to the underground and fell asleep on the couches down there.

That same day, I went to Cashes Valley with Kyle and Clint. I think that was actually the second time we had gone, but it was still one of the first times. I had rediscovered it on a map, and took Kyle and Clint out to it. What a year of fun that place has given us. It’d give us even more fun if they didn’t have it all blocked off for private property.

This fall Kyle, Clint, and myself went down to Berry to hang out for a while. We took the video camera with us, and made a day of it. Lauren was able to join us for a little while, but we spent most of the day with Rachel. That day will forever live digitally on Facebook as a whacked out video. That was another one of those “best days of the year”. We did everything from climbing the hill behind the mill, rolling down the hill at frost chapel in the middle of a wedding, while being filmed by a guy in an afro. That was pretty amazing.

As I sit here at my desk in front of my heater, sipping on a glass of Bailey’s, my attention was brought to the fact that I have not made a blog post in a while, once again. I had told myself that I wouldn’t feel bad about not making posts, but it’s starting to happen. I have two problems when it comes to making posts. I go so long without feeling like I have done anything significant to post about, untill I look back on everything and see that there is a lot to write about. At which point, I start avoiding making a post, because it’s going to take forever.
I also can’t quite figure out why I keep a blog. It might be partially to have the memories, that I would likely forget about if I didn’t have it. It could also be for my friends and family to keep up with what is going on in my life. However, I am fairly sure that no one in my family reads this thing, and most of my friends that read it, are with me when the things I write about happen. So really, it isn’t for anyone but myself.

The waltz with Rachel was a success, from everything that I hear about it. I was really nervous about it, but luckily it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I was still shaking when I came off the dance floor, but there weren’t as many eyes on me as I thought there was going to be. Which is both a good and a bad thing. Good in the fact that I didn’t wind up throwing up from nervousness, bad in the fact that Rachel was expecting more, and ordered a whole lot more food than she actually needed. Which, in itself wasn’t a bad thing, because lots of people ate off of it for a while. The bad part of it is that she wasted money on food she didn’t need.
Anyway, there is a video of us dancing it on Rachel’s computer, but it might be a while before she ever gets it posted. I would like to have it eventually, so I can show people. Even if I think I didn’t do the best, it’s still interesting to watch.

I hit my goal of 50,000 words in the month of November for my novel. It’s still no where near finished, and I don’t know if it ever will be. I think about it every once in a while, but it’s such a big task set before me, very daunting. Maybe some day when the mood hits me, and I actually feel like writing it, I’ll finish it. However, I need to find a reason for writing it. As of right now it feels very cliche, and like I have no real reason for writing it. Other than to hit my goal of 50,000 words, which I did. I might get those 50,000 put into a book format, just to show that I actually did it. We’ll see.

I feel like there is a lot more that I could, and should, be writing about. I just can’t seem to think of anything right at the moment. I can’t even think of what has been going on in my life since my last post. I feel like my life is kind of a wash right now, with nothing in particular going on. It’s just full of daily activity, full of just the comings and goings of a mindless wanderer. Like I am waiting for something, but not quite sure about what it is. It’s sitting there, just out of reach, taunting me.
Hopefully whatever it is, is going to blow my socks off.

To quote the most defining literary work of our time,

Cinnamon Teddy Grahams are so good that they will likely be banned in the future USSA. This will be the final catalyst which will cause several states to secede, and bitter civil war will ensue. A decisive battle will be fought at the Nabisco plant in Chicago, Illinois.

Thank you Clint Blizzard, for this most amazing piece of art.

I don’t know what it is about blog that I start them, do very well with updating them for a couple months, and then nothing. It’s like I completely forget that I have them at all. I imagine part of it is laziness. Not feeling like writing down everything that’s going on in my life right now.

Of course part of it is that I am still unemployed. Not having any good stories to share about my experiences at work is not conducive to a good blog post. That shouldn’t stop me though, because I have plenty of other things that I could be writing about. So, I guess I’ll just write about those things this time. Maybe. If I can remember them all.

Well, for starters I just got back from Pigeon Forge, TN. with all of my family and friends. It was particularly awesome, since we were camping. Most of us anyway (looks at Kyle and Clint). Jim Leslie and myself slept out under the stars all weekend. It was a really nice weekend for it. My only complaint is that the second night, we put up a canopy and dew collected on it and started doing chinese water torture on me in the middle of the night.

We went to Dollywood on Saturday and had a pretty good time. The “kids” and adults pretty much spent the entire time in oposite ends of the park, as near as I can figure. At the end of the day we met back up with them, and the girls, Mr. and Mrs. Leslie, and my father went roller-coastering. Kyle, Clint, and I went off to the other end of the park to the musical instrument store, and then went and got funnel cakes. Yum.

On the way out of Dollywood, Clint and I bought Rachel a baby sippy-cup, to everyone’s delight. It was pretty hillarious.
After that, 6 of us piled into Kyle’s Jeep Wrangler and drove around Pigeon Forge for about and hour, trying to find our way back to the campsite. It probably wouldn’t have been so bad, had we not been trying to avoid the classical car show (and had I not piped up and said I thought I remembered the way). We passed a couple cops, all without seatbelts, and lap sitting going on in the front seat. Awesome times.

I know that we did a ton of stuff that made us absolutely bust with laughter, but of course I can’t remember any of it now.
I do remember one of the funny things we did was… Kyle, Clint, and myself hid under the Jeep (laying on the ground), and waited for the girls to come walking by to scare them. When they finally did, Kyle and I were pointed the wrong way, and Clint didn’t act. So, we just were “chillin’” under the Jeep for a couple more minutes untill they shined a flashlight under the Jeep because they thought my shoe was a duck.

Anyway… Something else pretty neat going on right now, is that I am working on a script for a short film/movie to show at church or Elevate. I have the youth pastor’s backing, and he gave me some ideas for it. I still need to talk to our Sr. pastor about it though. It’s going to be a pretty big project, but hopefully with the Church’s help, I’ll be able to do a lot of things that I normally wouldn’t be able to. I am already starting up character designs and trying to figure out feasible special effects shots. Might even have to do a couple of prosthetics for scars. Goodness…

However, I am getting ahead of myself. I still need to finish the script. At least the youth pastor said he would help me with it, once his schedule clears up a bit. Which would be a couple months most likely. Why do things have to always be so complicated?

Letsee… What else… Ah yes, I started the application process for Moody Bible Institute in Chicago. I still need to go over to Dalton state here in town and see what all they want for the application process. I went onto their website, and I swear they purposefully don’t want you to figure out how to do anything on it. It’s crazy.

Okay… that’s it for now I think. Tah tah!

It’s been so long since I have made any posts. I should feel ashamed of myself, however I am not. So, all two of you are probably not wondering what’s going on in my life right now. So, of course I am going to tell you. That is, I’ll tell you if I can figure it out myself. It’s a little bit confusing at the moment.

So, at the moment I am still out of a job. However, I am starting to do a couple things with my life, because I am getting seriously sick of sitting around. Like, seriously serious.
So, I have been doing a couple things with the church (designing and building a website, designing shirts, and other stuff). I have also recently started a script for a movie that I want to do in junction with the church for the youth group. I am not sure how I am going to get it all accomplished, but maybe it’ll come to something.

Really, that is about all that’s going on. Man, my life is not all that productive right now. About as productive as a pile of poo… steaming, and that’s about it. Not moving, at least to the naked eye. Wow. What a great annalogy. (Raises eyebrow.)

So anyway… to give me a little bit more filler, I am going to do this survey from Nikki’s blog. You don’t have to read it, it’s likely not going to be all that interesting anyway. Not to mention I do so many of them, that you probably know all the information already. How sad.

—-

If you knew you could not fail, what would you do?
I would be a writer and director, I do believe. I would love to write books and screenplays, then make them into movies. Man, so awesome.

What is your zodiac sign?
Saggitarious, or however you speel it.

Do you want to learn another language?
Gaelic of any and all sorts would be pretty sweet. Then no one could keep up with my conversations (in the States). It’s hard enough for them already.

5 things you can’t live without:
God, sustanance, sleep, friends, books.

Do you have any siblings?
I wish I did. Maybe life wouldn’t be so lonely.

If you could plan your ultimate vacation, where would you go?
Where WOULDN’T I go?

What mountain would you want to climb someday?
In a perfect world, I would say that I would love to climb Everest. However, I don’t know as if I will ever get around to it. Wouldn’t that be so amazing though? Standing at the top of the world. Any direction you look, you just see the uninterupted vastness of God’s glory and creation.

Say something to the person who tagged you:
Sup! I imagine I’ll talk to you tomorrow, however if I don’t, I’ll see you Thursday.

What do you think has been the greatest invention in your lifetime?
The internet, of course. Thanks Al Gore, you’re the best.

What kind of magazines do you read?
Covert Side

What’s your occupation?
Occupation? You mean, like a job? That’s a good one.

What’s really creepy?
According to a lot of people, I am. However, they change their mind once they get to know me. I’m a charmer… har har.

Who is your celebrity crush?
Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhm… To tell you the truth, I have no idea. I know there was someone, but I don’t remember who it was. I told Nikki not all that long ago… maybe she’ll leave a comment with who it was, if she remembers.

What’s your current fandom/obsession/addiction?
Well, my last one was Time Travelers Wife. However, at the moment I haven’t been able to put down my bible. It’s got so many great and inspiring stories in it. Which, a lot of people wouldn’t really view that as a good answer. So, other than that… I really am not into a whole lot right now.

What are you listening to right now?
Well, I was listening to Lara Ruggles myspace page a few minutes ago. I’ve been listening to a lot of Jars of Clay lately, though.

What are you most excited for?
I dunno. I guess I am looking forward to this weekend pretty good.

What websites do you always visit when you go online?
Facebook, DIII, and sometimes Twitter. I go a ton of other places too, but not every time.

What was the last thing you bought?
Stuff for dinner today, by not with my money. Mom sent me to the store for it. So, the last thing that I personally bought was a bowl of chili the other night at Wendy’s. Last thing that wasn’t food was, gasoline. Before that, some new pants at Wal*Mart.

What’s the closest you’ve come to becoming a pop star/winning an Oscar?
I have starred in several movies from Thirsty Dog Productions.

—

Well, seizure!

Stories, exactly 100 words long. We had a pile of about 30 words in front of us, and we just took a word or two that stuck out at us, and used that as the inspiration for a drabble. There were some pretty interesting things that came out of it. Apparently they did the same thing last week, I wish I had remembered to go.

Anyway, here are my drabbles.

River Angel

She sat on her rock in the middle of the river. Always waiting for her knight to come. It was promised at her birth. That was thirty-two years ago, and still she waited.

But wait, what was this noise? A clank of metal, the crushing of leaves. Had the day finally come?

Indeed it had, the knight stood before her. He removed his helmet and looked at her, his eyes shining in the afternoon sun. He slowly walked forward, and cupped her face in his hands.

Tears fell down her cheek.
This was the start. Finally, it had come.

Sleep Cook

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” I awoke with a start. I had a knife in my hand. Surprised, I dropped the knife and stubbed my toe. Bouncing up and down on one foot and yelping. I just barely missed stepping on the knife.

“WELL?” My wife asked impatiently. I looked around, having no clue what the hell was going on.

Apparently I had been sleep walking, had made my way down to the kitchen, and then started cooking. This was awkward.

I looked adoringly into my wife’s eyes, and said as calmly as I could, “It looks like I’m making breakfast.”

Well, that was fun! Just got back from a local writing group that is meeting at our Starbucks. It was pretty neat, writing and then sharing. It was something I never thought I would be able to do, but I did. Yay!
It was also very nice, being able to listen to other people’s stuff… and them talking about how they also get into writing blocks where they can’t think of anything. I’m not in this desolate pit alone!

So, tonight we did writing rounds, where someone would suggest a topic and then we would write about it.
The three topics were as follows:
I remember
Music
Mirrors

We wrote for roughly ten minutes, anything that came to mind, and then shared it. It was cool…
So, here’s what I came up with…

I Remember

I remember when the flowers bloomed in the spring and the taste of strawberry jam on warm toast as my grandmother sang songs of days gone past.

I remember the comfort I felt when my brother came back from the war. The safety of having him back home safe and sound.

I remember the darkness of those stormy nights and the chill of the rain as I danced with God.

Forever in my memory shall be the hill in the country where we buried my grandfather then years ago.
Of the sleepless nights as my soul mourned the loss of that which was dear.

The sunrise of a new day dawning, the memories that I knew I would create, and the adventures I would have.

Forever in a day, and a day in a second.

Love, life, the pursuit of happiness. These are the good memories.

Death, life, forever and always will I remember.

Music

Music – The nectar of life. Rythm and soul poured into an instrument. Poetry sung with friends.

Things of the past, of the present, and future.
Dancing to the smiles and cheer of joy. Forever will music be the one thing that binds us together.

The international language. Friendship formed over strings and laughter.

No matter the type, you will have comradery, those who also enjoy your style. An instant bond in a fast paced world.

What would the world be without music? Is it even possible to avoid it? Does the earth itself not sing out even without us?

Will not the rocks even sing if we forget how?
All we need to do is listen for it, and it will always be there.

Even when the forces of ill try to repress us, still we will sing. Just ask the Scots if they will be silent. War has broken out over such things.

We will not be silent and forever shall we sing!

Mirrors

I look into your depths and what do I see? You are a piece of glass with a reflective coating, but you are also so much more. Do I often stand in front of you and truly see what you are showing me?

So often I stand in front of you momentarily just to see my appearance.

How often I miss the more subtle things you show me. You give me a daily look into my very soul, and yet I never see it. Once in a while I might catch a glimpse of it, but it’s gone in a flash.

Am I secretly trying to avoid what you’re showing me? The eyes are a window to a man’s soul, and yet I so often miss what is shining back at me.

For something so simple, you know people most. You see them at their best and worst, and show them for who they really are. You are the brutally honest friend. Yet we take you for granted.

Maybe from here on out, I will pay more attention to what you’re trying to tell me.

I notice that I am going longer and longer without making a post on my blog. This happens every time I start up a blog. It’s like I start off and it’s going great. Then something happens, and I just lose it. I stop making posts, and it really makes me sad. I don’t know what to do about it.

Of course, other than just making posts. No matter how short they are.
Just post because I feel like it.

On a whole different topic, it sometimes makes me sad that my friends have completely changed in the past six months. Within the past six months, I have gone from wanting to spend all my time in Ellijay, because that’s where everyone was and they didn’t like to go anywhere… to all the time being on the road. Between Ellijay and Rome all the time.

Even within Ellijay, I have been traveling more. The Blizzard’s and I have started doing more together. Like this past Saturday we went Jeeping out in Cashes Valley. We had a great time! Six months ago, I had pretty much stopped doing things like that. I have no idea why, either. There was no reason for it… I just stopped.

I know I commented on this a few posts ago, but I still am so thankful for it. That is friends that I can pray with and have conversations about God with. People my age that are on fire for the Lord. It’s amazing and refreshing to see and be a part of.

Last night Lorena and I were on the phone for quite some time, talking about God and his designs for his children. It’s like a recharge for my batteries, you know? It’s been so tremendously long since I have been able to be in a relationship where we both receive blessings from each other. Not just me mentoring the other person (like the kids), or me being mentored to (like the guys).

Words can’t really describe the feeling of walking together down the straight and narrow path.
(Content sigh)… Thank you, my God… My King… My Daddy.

Well, this past Tuesday I went down to Berry to spend some time with Lauren. We went and got a pizza, and then she took me up to the House of Dreams at the college.  It is an absolutely gorgeous place. It is no wonder that it got the name that it has. It’s both a dream house, and a place where dreams come from. There is a small fish pond up there, and even a small herb garden. It was absolutely wonderful.
We stayed there for a couple hours just eating pizza and hanging out. It was a place that I could have easily stayed at all day.

I am planning on making a return trip there with a notebook and pens, and just writing until my hand falls off.
It was very conducive to writing. On either side of the living room are really big windows with a gorgeous view. The sun floods in, and it is so relaxing to just sit there.
If you don’t feel like staying inside, the sound of trickling water and the smell of rosemary and sage in the garden are gifts from God. Man, it is truly an amazing place up there.

Lauren was telling me that the students built it for the founder of the college (Martha Berry) in her later years. I am not entirely sure if she lived there or not, but from the sounds of it… she did spend a great deal of time there. I will take my camera with me next time, and post some pictures.