Dangerous Business

Well, as I have been looking around at my usual haunts, I have been seeing a few poeple doing “The Year In Review” type things, so I just got the sudden urge to do that. Like, I didn’t even know that I was going to do it until I started typing that sentince up there. Funny how things like that work out so quickly.

At the begining of the year, I lost my job at Builder’s Choice. That was quite an interesting start to the New Year, I must say. I got quite a good bonus when I left, which was about the best part of it. That was just a really weird day. I didn’t know it was coming, and after they told me, I didn’t know what to do. I stuck around and worked for a while longer, because I felt like it was the right thing to do. However, I wound up getting so sick of the place by the end of the day, that I cut out an hour or two early.

I three new amazingly awesome friends. Lauren and Rachel have been a God send to me over the past year. My friendship with Rachel has become really deep, and I consider her one of my absolute best friends now. I am still getting to know Sarah, but she’s turning out to be a God send, as well. To think, if I hadn’t gone to Atlanta with Rachel to learn how to dance. January ‘09 was my second time going, if I remember right. I think that was the time that really got me hooked in it. Thank goodness I went, is all I can say. Friendships are wonderful, esspecially during the rough times.

I got my motorcycle license in February, and then promptly took a trip ON motorcycles down to Panama City Beach Florida. Of course, if you are a regular reader of my blog, or know me, you already know the story. Which of course, that describes all of my readers, so I don’t think I have to retell the story for you. Now, if I post this somewhere else, I might need to add a few more details… or just link to the old blog post.

In March, Rachel was out of town or something, and I went down to visit with Lauren. That was my favorite day of the entire year. I don’t know what made it so special, but it definately was the best by far. I’ll remember it forever. She took me to The House of Dreams on the Berry campus. My goodness, that place is magical. I got to really get to know Lauren that day, and see just how beautiful of a young lady she is becoming. She still has a lot to learn, but she’s going to make a special woman some day.
Anyway, we went up to the House of Dreams, had pizza in the chilly windy mountain air, shooed dogs away from our lunch, and took a stroll around the garden. She then showed me her book of pictures from Costa Rica. Man, I remember it like it was yesterday. Every detail seems so vivid. After we left there, we went and watched the Godfather, so we could both be true men. haha

I wound up losing a person that was starting to become a friend, as well. Everyone did, actually. At some point, something happened with Beth, and she stopped talking to all of us. I really hated to see that happen, because she did seem like a really good kid. I know it really hurt Lauren, too. I could see it in her eyes for a long time. Unfortunately, she’s moved past being hurt, to being a little bitter. Which, I can’t say that I blame her but it is still hard to watch.

I studied for and took the ACT at the begining of the summer! I actually didn’t do nearly as badly on it as I thought I would do. Which, that actually makes it sound like I still did poorly on it, which isn’t the case. The only thing I didn’t do well on was the math, which I expected when I went into it. I can’t stand that subject.

I started applications for a couple of colleges, but I didn’t finish them, because I seriously don’t know if I want to go. I go back and forth on it all the time. It’s not only the money aspect of it, quite a bit of it is that I just don’t know if I want to. Which I find extremely frustrating, going back and forth. The indecision is absolutely killing me, but yet I continue to do it. Who knows what I will wind up doing.
I sort of feel like if I do go to college, I will wind up wasting time and not doing some really awesome things that I could have done, had I not gone. However, in the long run, I might miss out on some things that I could have done, had I gone. Either way, I’m just screwed.

Goodness, this year in terms of having crushes on people has been a little crazy. I don’t remember ever thinking that so many girls were cute, or had potential. Esspecially not when I fall on my face with them. They either aren’t interested, I never tell them I’m interested, or… well, any number of things. After all is said and done, it often makes me feel like I should just say “Good riddance” to relationships, and go about my own way.

In May, I started going to the local writer’s group. It’s been quite nice to be able to get with like minded people, and write about random stuff. I even accomplished something I never thought was possible. I wrote 50,000 words for a story in November. That was pretty amazing… Though, it did make me a bit sick of writing for a while.

The six of us (Kyle, Clint, me, Lauren, Rachel, and Sarah) went to the Renaissance Fair over the summer, before Rachel took off to go out west. Of course, the day we chose to go was an absolute downpour in the early part of the day. It was thunderstorming like crazy, with lightning strikes and stuff. After it stopped raining, it actually wasn’t too bad. There were a couple of interesting experiences there, which I think were totally worth it. I would love to go again this year, but I don’t know how it’ll all work out.

Speaking of going to fairs and stuff, the six of us also went to Dollywood several times over the course of the year. That was pretty fun every time we went. Lots of memories to hold onto forever. I hope we can have more experiences like that over the next year.

I tried out contacts… what a joke.

Lauren moved to Dalton over the summer, and Rachel moved to Wyoming. It was pretty nice having Lauren so close, but we didn’t go to see her nearly as often as I wish we could have. Not to mention she was really busy for the most of it, being the social butterfly that she is. We tried to go watch Transformers 2 with her, but that was also a joke. The theater was packed out, and we hardly saw Lauren at all. We wound up just leaving early.
We also coined the phrase “Up and Over” in Dalton, one day when we pulled into on coming traffic, and had to go over the median. That was pretty wicked.
We didn’t hear much out of Rachel for the whole summer, and we were pretty bummed out about that. Which actually wound up causing problems later on, when there were some misunderstandings, but nothing too major that we didn’t work out.

My life was tremendously slow for a couple months. I can’t really remember much of anything that I did. I was out of work, and sat at home on my computer for a good part of the time. I remember going absolutely insane from the lack of anything. That was not exactly the best time of my life. Probably some of the worst days of the year were spent in that time frame. I got into a pretty deep funk, and it took me quite a while to get out of it.

The Blizzard’s hired me in October. It was such a relief to be able to go back to work. I was hired on doing web design and building. I have now moved on to do some small work in marketing, which is pretty neat. It was definately the challenge for my brain that I needed. My brain got squishy, because I wasn’t using it enough. Yay for excersize. Of the brain. Forget that gym stuff.

Staying up super late, not wanting to go home, going to Wal*Mart and buying cream soda and Teddy Grahams. I suggest that to anyone.

I got back in contact with an ex of mine in October, as well. Seems hard to believe that I started talking to her again that long ago, looking back on it now. It seems like we just started talking a couple weeks ago. She’s gotten married in the time we’ve been back in contact. Man, talk about weird to witness. Someone I used to date, getting married to a guy with the same first name as me.
I’m glad she found the right guy though. It does make me feel old, but that’s not always a bad thing.

The last couple months of the year were just a blur. Towards the end of October, Rachel asked me to be her dance partner for the Masquerade ball. That was quite an experience as well. I will remember that one for the rest of my life too, whether I want to or not. It wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be, but it was bad enough. Looking back on it now, I am almost embarrassed that my parents and grandparents went. It seemed like such a big deal at the time, but it seems like I blew it a little bit out of proportion. Esspecially since no one else’s parents showed up. It was just all college aged kids. Oh well… I’ll always just be that weird kid who’s Rachel’s friend, at Berry.

I turned 22 years old this year. Turning a year older is starting to get to me now. I have finally hit that magical age where you start to notice you’re not a kid any more. It’s not nice. Because now the birthdays will come quicker and quicker.

Then in the past couple months, there’s been a lot of really private stuff going on, that I don’t want to put out there to the world. It’s still too fresh in my mind, and I am still mulling over it. I don’t know if it’ll ever be “old enough” to let the void/internet know about it. If you really want to know about it, you can just ask me. However, I probably won’t tell you.

What a year…

—-

Additions: More things that I have remembered after posting this a little bit ago.

I think it was back in the spring, I went down to Berry for Relay for Life, and sat up all night long with Jessica at the Swing Dance booth. It was quite funny actually, because we were the only ones at the booth for the majority of the night, and neither of us belonged to it. Jessica was more uptight about it, I didn’t care too much.
Lauren wasn’t feeling well that night, and slept for a good part of it. I took her asprin and blankets all throughout the night, and kept an eye on her. Seems like I woke her up at about 5:00am, and then we went and had breakfast at IHOP. It seems like I got an omlet, and she got pancakes with sausage, but she wasn’t hungry enough to finish them. On the way to IHOP, we stopped on the side of the highway and watched the sun rise, which was pretty amazing. After we got back, we went to the underground and fell asleep on the couches down there.

That same day, I went to Cashes Valley with Kyle and Clint. I think that was actually the second time we had gone, but it was still one of the first times. I had rediscovered it on a map, and took Kyle and Clint out to it. What a year of fun that place has given us. It’d give us even more fun if they didn’t have it all blocked off for private property.

This fall Kyle, Clint, and myself went down to Berry to hang out for a while. We took the video camera with us, and made a day of it. Lauren was able to join us for a little while, but we spent most of the day with Rachel. That day will forever live digitally on Facebook as a whacked out video. That was another one of those “best days of the year”. We did everything from climbing the hill behind the mill, rolling down the hill at frost chapel in the middle of a wedding, while being filmed by a guy in an afro. That was pretty amazing.

As I sit here at my desk in front of my heater, sipping on a glass of Bailey’s, my attention was brought to the fact that I have not made a blog post in a while, once again. I had told myself that I wouldn’t feel bad about not making posts, but it’s starting to happen. I have two problems when it comes to making posts. I go so long without feeling like I have done anything significant to post about, untill I look back on everything and see that there is a lot to write about. At which point, I start avoiding making a post, because it’s going to take forever.
I also can’t quite figure out why I keep a blog. It might be partially to have the memories, that I would likely forget about if I didn’t have it. It could also be for my friends and family to keep up with what is going on in my life. However, I am fairly sure that no one in my family reads this thing, and most of my friends that read it, are with me when the things I write about happen. So really, it isn’t for anyone but myself.

The waltz with Rachel was a success, from everything that I hear about it. I was really nervous about it, but luckily it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I was still shaking when I came off the dance floor, but there weren’t as many eyes on me as I thought there was going to be. Which is both a good and a bad thing. Good in the fact that I didn’t wind up throwing up from nervousness, bad in the fact that Rachel was expecting more, and ordered a whole lot more food than she actually needed. Which, in itself wasn’t a bad thing, because lots of people ate off of it for a while. The bad part of it is that she wasted money on food she didn’t need.
Anyway, there is a video of us dancing it on Rachel’s computer, but it might be a while before she ever gets it posted. I would like to have it eventually, so I can show people. Even if I think I didn’t do the best, it’s still interesting to watch.

I hit my goal of 50,000 words in the month of November for my novel. It’s still no where near finished, and I don’t know if it ever will be. I think about it every once in a while, but it’s such a big task set before me, very daunting. Maybe some day when the mood hits me, and I actually feel like writing it, I’ll finish it. However, I need to find a reason for writing it. As of right now it feels very cliche, and like I have no real reason for writing it. Other than to hit my goal of 50,000 words, which I did. I might get those 50,000 put into a book format, just to show that I actually did it. We’ll see.

I feel like there is a lot more that I could, and should, be writing about. I just can’t seem to think of anything right at the moment. I can’t even think of what has been going on in my life since my last post. I feel like my life is kind of a wash right now, with nothing in particular going on. It’s just full of daily activity, full of just the comings and goings of a mindless wanderer. Like I am waiting for something, but not quite sure about what it is. It’s sitting there, just out of reach, taunting me.
Hopefully whatever it is, is going to blow my socks off.

Well, that was fun! Just got back from a local writing group that is meeting at our Starbucks. It was pretty neat, writing and then sharing. It was something I never thought I would be able to do, but I did. Yay!
It was also very nice, being able to listen to other people’s stuff… and them talking about how they also get into writing blocks where they can’t think of anything. I’m not in this desolate pit alone!

So, tonight we did writing rounds, where someone would suggest a topic and then we would write about it.
The three topics were as follows:
I remember
Music
Mirrors

We wrote for roughly ten minutes, anything that came to mind, and then shared it. It was cool…
So, here’s what I came up with…

I Remember

I remember when the flowers bloomed in the spring and the taste of strawberry jam on warm toast as my grandmother sang songs of days gone past.

I remember the comfort I felt when my brother came back from the war. The safety of having him back home safe and sound.

I remember the darkness of those stormy nights and the chill of the rain as I danced with God.

Forever in my memory shall be the hill in the country where we buried my grandfather then years ago.
Of the sleepless nights as my soul mourned the loss of that which was dear.

The sunrise of a new day dawning, the memories that I knew I would create, and the adventures I would have.

Forever in a day, and a day in a second.

Love, life, the pursuit of happiness. These are the good memories.

Death, life, forever and always will I remember.

Music

Music – The nectar of life. Rythm and soul poured into an instrument. Poetry sung with friends.

Things of the past, of the present, and future.
Dancing to the smiles and cheer of joy. Forever will music be the one thing that binds us together.

The international language. Friendship formed over strings and laughter.

No matter the type, you will have comradery, those who also enjoy your style. An instant bond in a fast paced world.

What would the world be without music? Is it even possible to avoid it? Does the earth itself not sing out even without us?

Will not the rocks even sing if we forget how?
All we need to do is listen for it, and it will always be there.

Even when the forces of ill try to repress us, still we will sing. Just ask the Scots if they will be silent. War has broken out over such things.

We will not be silent and forever shall we sing!

Mirrors

I look into your depths and what do I see? You are a piece of glass with a reflective coating, but you are also so much more. Do I often stand in front of you and truly see what you are showing me?

So often I stand in front of you momentarily just to see my appearance.

How often I miss the more subtle things you show me. You give me a daily look into my very soul, and yet I never see it. Once in a while I might catch a glimpse of it, but it’s gone in a flash.

Am I secretly trying to avoid what you’re showing me? The eyes are a window to a man’s soul, and yet I so often miss what is shining back at me.

For something so simple, you know people most. You see them at their best and worst, and show them for who they really are. You are the brutally honest friend. Yet we take you for granted.

Maybe from here on out, I will pay more attention to what you’re trying to tell me.

I think Lauren gave me the knot in her neck. I woke up this morning, and my neck is hurting.

Anyway… I had a great time this weekend. I went over to Berry on Thursday night, and went to the weekly swing dance. I had an overall good time, but only danced like… four songs, because there was a lot of Latino musica being played… and I am not good enough to dance that yet.  So, I watched for the most part. It was fun watching everyone out there having a good time. (Other than the snogging that one couple was doing.)

For the most part, we really didn’t do a whole lot over the weekend… but we hung out and had a good time. It was fun enough that I didn’t notice we weren’t really doing much.
Beth and I got Lauren to watch V for Vendetta. That was pretty awesome. It’s been a while since I have seen it. I need to go buy another copy, as mine is missing. Maybe I should get it on Blu Ray, to speed up the process of getting a Blu Ray player.

There were so many pictures of me taken over the weekend, it’s ridiculous. I would have broken the card, had I realized they were all going to be put up for the world to see.
Though, there are a few good ones with Beth and Lauren with me that didn’t turn out bad.

Last night before I left Lauren, Beth, and I all prayed. Gosh, it felt good to do that with friends. It’s been a while since I have had anyone to pray with. It’s always nice to talk to Dad when you have people to share his love with.

Alright, I’m off… Not sure to what to do… but I am.

Well, I am finally making another blog post after a couple of weeks of absolutely nothing. My life has been slow lately, as you might have guessed from my last entry. I have been spending my time working on XHTML and CSS. It’s been slightly frustrating, but luckily Kyle is there to call me an idiot and put me back on the right track if I mess up.

So, last weekend my buddies and I got together and watched Jurassic Park here at the house. Kyle, Clint and I decided that Rachel had to see it… She wasn’t too keen on the idea, as she doesn’t like scary movies. So, we strapped her down to the couch and pinned her eyelids open. She only jumped out of her skin a couple times.
Of course, that started Kyle and Clint and I on our quote spree, like we usually do. We don’t talk… we quote.

Speaking of movies, today is a great one. I think I might go put it on the netflix “watch now” list and watch it.
Nothing like Bill Murray living the same day over and over again… Man, that would be awesome. Be able to do anything you wanted to, without consequences. What would I do?
If anyone is actually reading this, leave comments with what you would do.

So then this weekend, I went down to Berry College and went hiking for several hours. Then we went swing dancing at the Ford Dining Hall. That was just fantastic, man. I danced the best I have ever danced before, I do believe. I also learned a new move or two, if I can remember them. One of them is a finishing move that makes onlookers gasp every time. It’s awesome making everyone think I dropped my partner from a height of about three feet… onto her back.

Of course I had two Starbuck’s coffees and couldn’t sleep at all. So I wound up skipping church on Sunday. I know, I’m a heathen… especially with dancing all night. Then I even skipped church on Sunday night, because I felt sick. Even this morning, I am still not feeling all peaches and cream. On top of that, my muscles are now killing me from hiking and dancing so much. Weeeee…

So… that’s a quick run down of my last couple weeks. Nothing too exciting, but not bad.

So, I am going swing dancing in Atlanta on Friday night again. It’s been since before Christmas since I last practiced at all. I hope I don’t make a complete fool of myself. Because I think that this time I am going to try dancing with more than just one or two people. I am going to force myself to walk up to a complete stranger and ask to dance. I think I am going crazy.

I should really see if I can find some good looking clothing before I go though. If I remember right, the last time I went in a polo shirt and khakis. If I can swing it, this time I would like to go in something a little dressier. Be it a blazer, or what have you. Of course the shoes might be a problem, but I’ll have to work on it.

If I was really lucky, I could find a fedora or something before Friday. That ain’t gonna happen though, if I had to guess. I keep thinking about going over to the Faith, Hope, and Love across the street and see if they have anything that would work. Since Lord knows I can’t afford anything right now.

Why does every hobby that I pick have to cost so much? Dancing doesn’t cost much after you get into it… but the start up is kinda pricey… Trying to find nice clothes and slag. Sheesh. Of course the horses were really expensive. Be it money, time, blood, sweat, tears… Yeah, I like expensive things.

Alright, so I gave my cell phone number to a guy at work. That was not a smart idea. He’s the type of guy that is always outgoing and all that slag. He has to be talking to someone at all times, I swear.
So here I am at the lumber counter… he’s outside, probably 200 feet from me, and he calls me to chat. Mmm-hmm.

Alright, so he has been trying to convince me to go to Blue Ridge at 6:30 in the morning to work out with him. Uh… I think I am going to pass. He’s been getting on my nerves about it though. I don’t know what to do.
I am not even working out with my best buds lately, because I need to go to the doctor. That will only put him off for so long. After I go see the doc though, he’ll be on me again. Even though I told him I didn’t want to go up there.

He’s also been trying to convince me to go bowling with him. Or at least come “see how real men bowl”. He’s on a league, so he can bowl pretty good. Of course my average of 90 or whatever, is an embarrassment…
That I might do, but I don’t do that very often either.

Anyway… What else can I talk about?
Rachel is off to college now, so home life is going to be slow again. While she was home between being out west and going to school, the Blizzard’s and I went over to her house and watched a movie. Sarah was there too, so that was pretty cool. We wound up staying up and rough housing till about 1:00 in the morning. We probably would have stayed longer but I didn’t want to get them into trouble.

It’s nice that from what it seems… both Sarah and Rachel get along good with Kyle and Clint. Sarah and Kyle just need to stop being so quiet.
Yeah Kyle, I’m talking about you.

So… here at work, things are getting scarier. Slowing down ever more. Even when things seem to be picking up for a moment or two, you realize they were just faking you out.
They have decided to close the doors on Sundays, as they weren’t doing enough business. They finally listened, I can’t believe it!! There are rumors going around that there’s going to be another layoff in a couple weeks though. A separate rumor that it might be someone that has something to do with paint, which would be either Jeff, Paula, or myself. We’ll see how that goes.

Anyway, I really should get back to work. Now that I have typed over 700 words.
And you read them all. Sucker.

Okay, so I didn’t make it back after that last post to tell you what I did that evening. Or several of the days after that, for that matter. So, I guess I should finally fill you in on the proceeding days after my last post.

So for starters, that night the Blizzard’s joined me for a dance out by Rachel Leslie’s house, that she was hosting. They even danced a little bit. They both did really good, actually. Clint a little better than Kyle, but I don’t think Kyle was trying as hard as Clint was.
So, I danced for about three and half hours. Learned several new dances that I can’t remember. Including, but not limited to: the foxtrot, the waltz, the cha-cha, the tango, and a few new moves for the swing. I do have to say that swing is still my favorite for the moment, but the waltz could easily knock it to second. There is something that just looks and feels impressive about the waltz, even if you have no idea what you’re doing.
Rachel and I were the only ones out there dancing for about the last hour of the party. Everyone else was worn out, but we had a good time.

That was Saturday night. On Sunday night, the Blizzards and Rachel came over and we shot guns and hung out for about seven or eight hours. It was something like 11:30 when they all left, if I remember right. We shot a whole lot of rounds. I, of course, shot my new gun. The accuracy is questionable at the moment, but we’re working on it.
We got a few pictures, and quite a bit of footage of everyone shooting. So, I’ll see if I can post some of it at a later date.

The HK-91 knock off was the best part of it. It’s not supposed to be a sniper rifle, but it works as one. Kyle has a bipod and a scope on his. So, we were able to snipe some pumpkins… That was a blast. Literally.
I think that, and the little .22 handgun were the most fun to shoot. If we do that again any time soon, I think I might try to shoot my .40 with one hand. Probably not a good idea, but I think I can do it.

So, today I am at work until at least noon. Which it is unlikely that we’ll get out of here that quickly. It’s more likely to be 2:00, which we have permission to leave then if it’s really slow. 4:00 if it’s not. Which, it’s a little hard to say at the moment. It’s not really a good crowd coming in, but it’s not dead either. All I really have to say is, “Who the HECK comes in on Christmas eve to buy lumber?!”… The answer is, “Quite a few.”
Retards… buying lumber, so I can’t go home early… *Pout.*

And I said, I don’t care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I’m, I’m quitting, I’m going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they’ve moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn’t bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it’s not okay because if they take my stapler then I’ll set the building on fire…

Alright, Milton… I’ve got to go… Yeah, alright. Okay… See you now. Bye.

Edit: I was informed the HK-91 is not a “knock off” which implies negativity. It’s a clone, which is much better.

Tonight in the Wal*Mart parking lot, here in Ellijay three churches from Ellijay put on a mini concert. It was really quite awesome, they had music and marsh mellows, and cocoa, and cider… Yum.

There were a couple songs that were fast enough that a couple of people were out there swing dancing. Rachel and I were the first ones to do it, but by the end there were about three seperate couples out there. I had a great time making a fool of myself.

From what I was told after I got home, at one point in time while we were dancing there was a small crowd that had started to gather around us, watching. If I had known that, I would have probably freaked out and sent Rachel crashing into a fire barrel. I almost did a couple time anyway, but… yeah.

Kyle and Clint even came, which was really awesome. It was nice to be able to be able to just get out and have fun… even if it was in a crowd, in the middle of a parking lot. It used to be, that would freak me out. I am getting a little better though, and it’s really nice.
I — was going to type something here but got distracted. Lost it. Dangit.

So anyway… The point is… It was a nice night.