Needs…

It’s now only been about three months since I last had a job, but it’s been about two years since I last had any income. I worked free of charge for almost two years, and it really hurt my bank account. I now only have money left over from a grant that I got for college. I have tried very hard to make it last as long as possible, but I’ve accumulated so many things that I’ve needed to get or replace, that most of the money has dissapeared very quickly. Just the basics like clothing, put a very large dent in the funds that I had. I had so many holey clothes that I tossed out, it’s hard to believe that I had anything decent left.

It comes down to the problem that I need a job now. I can only do a part time, with really whacky hours, but I need something. So, I hear Lowe’s is hiring…

Things to Ponder: The Weight of the World

Do you ever feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders? Pressing you deeper into the dirt and mud that is building up around your feet? If only you could get a little bit farther, you could lay down some of the weight and just relax for a bit… but the weight and mud are causing you to slow down so much, that you practically come to a stop. You’re just standing there; a prisoner of your own burdens. People walk by, looking at you but not realizing that you’re not actually supposed to be stuck there. They look at you and see you as a statue, admiring your for your strength and steadfastness, when in actuality, you just wish you could run? Eventually, the weight starts messing with your head. You see things that aren’t really there… and you feel like you’re completely alone. Even if it’s not true, your mind starts thinking that the people who would once come and keep you company and made the world a better place, have stopped caring. They’ve stopped coming by to visit… or they’ve just joined the rest of the world in watching you struggle on.

When I think of a metaphor for depression, this is what I come up with.

Things to Ponder: Life…

What is life, really? We all have one; it should be an easy question to answer. Unlike love and friendship, whom some people find themselves unable to find, life is shared by every being on this planet. It’s a word that we look over without really thinking much about it – “I am alive. Moving on…”. Is it just a way to define something as an organism? Do we see it merely as a progression through time? The passage from point A to point B with a series of fortunate and unfortunate events in-between. Others see it as more of a process of spirituality than true passage of time on the earth. The Buddhists believe in many lives; but even there, is it many lives, or is it one continuous life lived along the course of many periods of time? The Christians, Muslims, and Buddhists all believe in eternal life. Is this different from the life that so many see as us living on the earth, or is it the same life… never-ending? When does life really start? Is it at birth? At conception? Or does it stretch on to before conception… eternally? Does life only count if we inhabit a body?

Just some things to think about…

Themes, themes, and more themes…

Well, I might have finally found a theme that I like. It’s got nice colors and a nice layout, promoted images, shows the entire post without having to click to see more… I quite like it! So, I’ll stick with it for a while and see how it goes. Themes are so hard to pick; they have to have the right personality and feel… but I am never sure what that is.

So, today is valentines day. I never know whether or not to call it “Singles Awareness Day”, because that seems like someone who was single and bitter came up with that. I’m not actually bitter about about it, but I find the name highly amusing. Sure, I’d be happy if there was a special girl that I was taking out on a date tonight… but it’s not important to me that I must have someone. In fact, this valentines day, I feel quite happy that I don’t have to buy a special gift or do something special for someone. The demo for Mass Effect 3 came out today, and I get to spend my free time playing that, instead of trying to figure out what to do for someone. It might seem a little selfish, but it’s actually quite enjoyable.

I did think about going down to Atlanta for a dance tonight, but I really don’t feel like driving all that way after I get out of school; especially when tomorrow is my early day in classes. It’s just not worth it… So, I will play Mass Effect 3 and completely forget it’s valentine’s day. I wish luck to all those people out there with significant others though!

I am really enjoying this laptop so far. It seems weird to have a laptop that the screen doesn’t continually go on the fritz on you. It’s quite nice…

Anyway… there’s a small event at Starbucks in about an hour and I have a couple things I want to get done before it starts. So, I guess I’ll sign off for now!

Core i7?

I hardly know what to do with myself. I needed to get a new laptop for school, since my old one is now continually on the fritz; so I went down to MicroCenter in Atlanta and found a great deal on a Core i7 laptop. I went ahead and got 4 extra gigs of RAM for it as well, so this baby flies. It’s definately the fastest laptop I’ve ever really played with. And it’s technically faster than my tower, but it’s missing a graphics card, which my tower has. I’ve run a couple of tests on it, just to see how well it performs, and I am highly impressed and happy with it. Which, just amazes me, for what I paid for it.

I hope I can get up to the Blizzard’s today. Since I started school, I haven’t been hanging out with anyone very much. I went a month without seeing any friends at all, for the first month of school. Well, unless you count meeting one of them for tutoring, then leaving. Which I don’t… I count that as meeting my tutor, not as spending time with a friend. So, life has been pretty lonely lately.

I have made a new “online” friend, though. So, that gives me someone new to talk to and interact with. Still not quite like seeing someone in person, but it still makes up for a lack of talking to everyone else. With the Blizzards, we’ve pretty much talked about everything there is to talk about… so it seems like we don’t talk so much any more. But I really haven’t been logging on to messenger as much as I used to, either. Ah well… as they say, “This too shall pass”. Before you know it, I’ll be complaining about how I have all these friends and not enough time to spend with them all, because they ALL want to hang out with me ALL the time.
(cough)… right.

When you go so long without having more than a few bucks to your name, because you give away your time for free… it’s hard to suddenly have money. There’s so many things that I want to buy and do, that I haven’t been able to do for so long… but I want to save that money so that I can travel out to Wyoming in May… so, it’s one or the other. Not both. That’s hard… but, I can do it. I just pretend I’m still dirt poor. Which… isn’t far from the case. I still need to see if I can find a part-time job around here, that’s willing to work around my absolutely insane school schedule. Or…. find a job. Period. I’ve been all over town and haven’t gotten any responses. I was/am hoping to avoid the fast food industry, but it seems like that’s about all that’s left. Even then, they have an over-abundance of applications…

I can’t wait to get back to The Orchard, tomorrow. I’ve missed two Sundays from there and I can really feel it. The first Sunday, I had stayed up way too late the night before and slept right through my alarm. Then last Sunday, I went with my parents to their church. It was fine and all, but just not my thing. I have really enjoyed The Orchard and feel like it has become my home.

Okay…. I suppose I need to get out of my pajamas and put some real clothes on, get ready, go get something to eat… then go to the Blizzard’s. Their cousin Grady is there this week, but I don’t know for how much longer. I’d really like to go see him again before he leaves.

Peace out!

Please, Mr. Postman!

“Look!” said a man, standing some distance from the ground, atop a building, as he held one hand over his eyes and pointed with the other. A woman joined him at the railing, by which he was standing.
“What is it?!” she cried, also pointing. Within seconds, people were gathering all around; jostling and twisting for a good place to stand, to see the whatever.
“Is it a bird?”, one cried.
“It’s a plane!” another called out.
“No, it’s… a man making a post?” a small boy asked, severely disappointed at what he saw. The rest squinted, and upon seeing that he was correct, shook their heads and went about their business.

That’s right, I have returned! From great trips to far off places! Seeing wonders, previously unknown! Gather around, all who wish to hear tales of my adventures, and you surely shall not be disappointed. Or maybe you will, but that is not for me to say one way or the other. It shall be up to YOU, the reader, to decide the fate of this blog. To decide if it is worthy of your time to read this entry, even.

Now, I do want to say that I would like to be able to change the theme of the blog to something more awesome. However, it makes some of my posts not work properly, because of the way that they were set-up. There are pictures embedded in posts that don’t show up, unless the right theme is applied to the blog. How silly is that? But anyway, I digress into boring things that you don’t really care to read about. Which would make this blog/post a disappointment, which, as previously stated, is something that I am trying to avoid!

Letsee… biggest news in my life since my last blog update, I believe, is that I started school. That’s right… twenty-four year old me is entering the concrete jungle filled with testosterone laden young lads, whom are out to impress the ladies, and seemingly little else. I am so out of my element there, that it’s not even funny. I kid you not; most of the guys there are not paying a bit of attention during class. The teacher will say something, and they’ll all go, “Huh? What’d s/he say? I didn’t catch it.”
Well, no duh, you didn’t catch it! You were too busy chatting with the guy next to you about the roundness of a certain part of a female. There’s been times that I’ve wanted to turn to them and say, “Shut up or GTFO.”

Other than that, I helped my dad move the computer shop to a better location. I then quit, so I could go full time to school. I still go in occasionally to help him out with computer repairs, but for the most part… I am doing school full time. It’s actually been so much nicer since I left. My stress level has gone down, probably 10 fold. I think greatly in part to just being away from those annoying “song” birds. Actually, I am posting this from his office at the moment, and I’m sitting right next to the bird cage. I am about ready to toss the cage out the back door. They sit there and screech… not sing. Ugh.

I had a pretty good Christmas. My parents went out of town for a cruise and had me watch the house while they were gone. It was kinda lonely, but I was able to go to a friend’s house ALMOST every night. However, as a whole… the last month of the year and first month of this year, were pretty sucky. Of course, it seems that it’s always the bad months that you remember forEVER. The good months tend to slip from my memory, much faster. How is that even fair?

Anyway… we’re off to celebrate my mother’s birthday at Longhorn tonight. So, I need to start getting ready. Maybe I’ll be back with another update before too long.

So like… and stuff…

Yet again, I can’t seem to get on the ball with posting a blog. I don’t know what on earth it is about writing in the blog that I can’t keep it up. It might be something to do with the fact that I don’t really think anyone is really interested in reading what I have to write, since it’s all just random bits of junk. I really should find a purpose for this blog, and work towards that. Like, film-making or something.

Speaking of filming… my knees are killing me today. We were filming from sun down to midnight with no breaks, on a concrete slab, no sitting down. I think it’ll be a good short, but it’s still painful today. We really need to work on story-boarding our shots out so that filming goes faster and smoother. We also need to think about our lighting a bit more…  we just kinda throw it up and call it good enough. It’s not really consistent between shots.

Holy poop. There was something else I was going to write about but I have completely forgotten what it was. Alas, I guess that’s gone.

Anyway, to keep up to date with our films, be sure to visit www.thirstydogproductions.com

How?

How has it been a month since I last made an update on my blog? I was doing so well there for a while, being sure to update almost every day, or at least a couple times a week. Then all of a sudden, I just went and dove into oblivion.

In my defense, it has been a really rough month. I’ve had a lot of personal things going on. A lot of nights I just sit there staring at my desk, trapped in my own mind. Really quite annoying.
Things are starting to get a little easier though. All it takes is time.

I’ll try to get into the habit of posting again, but I am not making any promises.

Thirty Days of Jon: Day Twenty-Eight

Day Twenty-Eight: A Picture Of What You Wore Today

Seriously? I have to get up out of my chair and take a picture of myself? Then remove the card and plug it in to my computer? Then resize it? I am regretting deciding to do a second one of these tonight.
I think I am going to pass on that and just try to find what I am wearing on google images.

 

Today's shirt

Today's jeans

Thirty Days of Jon: Day Twenty-Seven

Day Twenty-Seven: Favorite Television Program

Hey look at that! We’re getting really close to being done with this thing. Thank goodness! Then I can start writing about other things… what, I don’t know. I just don’t ever feel like writing anything else when I know that I have to do this meme thing. It’s like it uses up all most blog words for the night.

Anyway, favorite television program. This one is another difficult one, as I don’t watch much television. I guess I’ll have to settle with NCIS, as it was the last TV show I was watching when I stopped really watching TV. I still enjoy catching the marathons of it on lazy Sunday afternoons. I’ve seen most of the episodes more than once and it still never gets old.

I think I’ll do one more tonight and two tomorrow, finishing up the 30 days of Jon.